End of a Dry April

The mud that was the yard a month ago
has cracked into crosshatch seams
wide enough for a man’s finger to fit
in the ground in the lawn south of the house.

To look at just the dirt this early in the season
before Bermuda and crabgrass have started to grow
gives reason to think April looks more like August.
That takes a very narrow focus, though.

The opening buds of iris blooms
and the rich green of fescue in the neighbor’s yard,
and the three nights in a row near or below freezing
just a few days ago, make it hard to think this is summer.

No, it’s just been an unusually dry April, I reckon.
And the National Weather Service is reckoning
that we’ll likely have some heavy rains today
right here in south central Kansas.

The colors shifting our way on the radar map
and the way the rumbling thunder
rattles the windows in the house
make me suspect they may be right.

Although the showers and thunderstorms
will bring a hiatus to my siding-the-house project,
they will definitely help the scraggly little blueberry bush
I just reset in a dry corner of the yard.

God has a way of bringing to each day
and each season
a reminder of the ways and reasons
that patient faith is often rewarded.

And though our plans seem sometimes thwarted,
and we don’t finish on schedule everything we started,
we may find from time to time as life still flowers
that a Better Plan was formed in a Greater Mind than ours.

H. Arnett
4/22/20

Posted in Christian Devotions, Christian Living, Gardening, Metaphysical Reflection, Poetic Contemplations, Poetry, Spiritual Contemplation | Tagged , , , , , , , | Comments Off on End of a Dry April

Visiting Dorothy During the Plague of 2020

On a sunny Lord’s Day afternoon
at the time of year when irises bloom
and the bright lavender of redbuds
has barely begun to fade in the fringe of the woods,

we stood outside her window at the hospital,
and tried our best to hear her words—
sometimes clear and strong
and sometimes fading into a long murmur,

a sort of mumbling through the screen,
thoughts barely said out loud,
crowded out by the whirring drone
of the huge AC unit fifty feet away.

She said she’d lost twenty-five pounds
in the two or three weeks she’d been there.
She didn’t say but I couldn’t help but think
that she didn’t have that much weight to spare.

But even though she seemed weak,
even though the lines of nearly ninety years
have etched deeply into the soft skin of her face,
and even though she bruises now with the slightest touch

There is still something of strength,
still something of that domineering pioneer spirit,
and that plain-spoken stubbornness,
sometimes tempered with a soft chuckle.

Something more in her eyes than in her voice
speaks of choices made long ago,
a road not always chosen but always traveled,
decades of doing what had to be done,

lying down at night long after the sun,
rising again and again,
working in the relentless winds of the plains,
enduring the pains of storms and troubles,

yet always knowing that He Who Has Made Us
has always kept his word,
always supplied for each day what was needed for the day,
and will welcome her into eternal rest

if she ever decides
she doesn’t want to be in Kansas anymore.

H. Arnett
4/20/20

Posted in Aging, Christian Devotions, Death & Dying, Family, Poetic Contemplations, Poetry, Spiritual Contemplation | Tagged , , , , , , | Comments Off on Visiting Dorothy During the Plague of 2020

What Lives Within

Several years ago, I read or heard someone say something like “There’s nothing like a crisis to build character.” I thought about that, quite a bit, as I observed or listened to reports from areas hit by flood, hurricane, tornado, earthquake and other instances of general mayhem.

My conclusion is that crises don’t build character nearly as much as they reveal it. The true inner person comes out in such situations. Compassion, criticism, selfishness, arrogance, humility, determination, consideration. All of those traits—and many others—may suddenly be put on display but those attributes were already present. The ones we nourish (or indulge) during a crisis or disaster or calamity will be made stronger. And be even more ready to be revealed in the next one.

During this time, we’ve seen our own values made more obvious. We realize what matters to us, what we’re willing to do to help safeguard the health and safety of others. Or what risks we’re willing to take and expect others to make. We come to see what sacrifices we’re willing to make and for what reasons. We find out about our own priorities and concerns and realize that sometimes those may conflict with one another.

We want to help protect our elderly relatives and friends—but we also want to be able to pay the mortgage. We want to do our part to minimize the risk of spreading disease—but we also want to have food to eat. We want to support those we love and those we don’t even know—but we also worry about the eventual economic fallout from prolonged sequestering.

Times like this assault our emotions, put our convictions to the test, and tempt us to superficially judge other people. We may find ourselves contemplating responses and reactions that contradict who we believed we were.

We have to have something that guards our minds and our hearts from the things that could eventually destroy them. Something that lets us shed the strains and stresses of the things that want to make us something other than what we truly desire to be. Something that steers us clear of spiritual, emotional, and mental danger.

Something like a conscience. Something like a healthy way of looking at the world. Something—or rather someone—like the Spirit of God living within us.

If we will trust, be quiet and listen for a while, and reflect on what Jesus spoke and taught, I believe we will find ourselves living as we ought to live. Walking in love, showing mercy, and remembering that God works for our good in all situations. Even this one.

H. Arnett
4/17/20

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More Than Good Looks

The plan was to scrape off the loose paint and repaint our small, ranch-style house. There’s a lot of loose paint on this old house which meant it would take a lot of scraping. But after I started the scraping, I realized the wide planks of western cedar siding are in worse shape than I first realized. In fact, they’re in worse shape than I second and third realized!

Many of the boards are cracked and split and several of them are badly cupped as well. That’s a shame, too. These boards are a full inch thick and twelve inches wide. Cut and milled back in the middle of the previous century. They would have still been in good shape, if they’d been kept painted. They weren’t, they aren’t, and they’re not going to be.

Some things get beyond reasonable repair and they have to be replaced. Ten years ago, fifteen years ago, a new coat of paint would have kept the wood protected from the sun, moisture and mildew that eventually grew back up underneath the loosening edge.

It will be a lot of work, tearing off the old siding and installing new. A lot of work.

But it will make the house look new and that’s not altogether insignificant. Another thing the new siding will do, and this ultimately is more important; it will keep the exterior sheathing and the frame from rotting. Keep the walls sound and the insides dry, even during the driving storm and the pounding rain.

I’m pretty sure that keeping a life safe and sound is both better and easier than trying to rebuild one.

H. Arnett
4/16/20

Posted in Christian Devotions, Christian Living, Metaphysical Reflection, Remodeling/Construction, Spiritual Contemplation | Tagged , , , , , | Comments Off on More Than Good Looks

Soft Flowers & Hard Frosts

I felt rather foolish, but I was getting a little desperate.

Just last year, in mid-summer, I set an apple tree in our back yard. Not the best time for setting trees and such, but I got a great deal on the tree. That’s how that works, you know: the lower the odds of survival, the lower the price. Buy great-looking healthy stock early in the season when it’s virtually guaranteed to thrive, pay top dollar. Later on, in the blistering heat of July when several weeks of drought are likely, you can get a really scraggly, blighted and wilted specimen for one-fourth of original price.

So naturally, that’s what I did with my purchase of the little Honeycrisp apple tree. Surprisingly enough, it sprouted leaves and bloomed this spring. Cool. Even cooler was the predicted low Sunday night: twenty-eight degrees. “Danggitt! Another late Arctic blast and it’s going to kill the blooms and buds!”

Not having any trash cans that are eight feet tall that I could upend over the tree, I searched through the barely wrinkled recesses of my brain for some idea that might protect the little clusters of fruit-promising blooms.

What I came up with was plastic bags. At first, I thought I’d put little Ziploc sandwich bags over each bloom cluster. That was interesting, what with the wind gusting to forty miles-an-hour and what have you. But the neighbor’s high board fence offered a little protection. At least to the lower five feet of the tree. While I was covering each set of pink flowers with the happy little blossom mittens, (actually they were “Glad bags”), it occurred to me that I could use kitchen trash bags and cover the whole load-bearing end of each branch.

So, I did that. Another happy little surprise, which once again made me glad, was that the bags stayed on the branches all Sunday night. In spite of the wind gusting to forty miles-an-hour and what have you. So, I did it again last night. And will do it again tonight. And tomorrow night…

I’m hoping that this will be the last spell of nights below freezing until late next fall. Even better, early next winter.

I don’t know if I’ll end up with edible apples a few months from now or not. But I do know that if I didn’t do something now to protect the blooms and branches, there’ll be no chance of a happy little harvest later on. Kind of like raising kids, surviving a pandemic, and such as that.

H. Arnett
4/14/20

Posted in Christian Devotions, Christian Living, Gardening, Humor, Metaphysical Reflection, Nature, Spiritual Contemplation | Tagged , , , , , | Comments Off on Soft Flowers & Hard Frosts

Black Saturday

Part I

I have tried from time to time
to wrap my mind around what it must have been like
to find myself a disciple of the Christ
waking up in Jerusalem on this Sabbath,
knowing that they’d finally killed
God’s Own Anointed yesterday.

“Wasn’t it just six days ago
that we stood with him on the Mount of Olives?”

“Didn’t we watch the crowds cutting branches
and laying their cloaks on the road?”

“Didn’t we hear them shouting ‘Hosanna! Hosanna!'”

“Didn’t we stand with him as he preached in the temple
and taught in the courtyard?”

“Just night before last,
did we not keep with him the Passover?”

And, in the blackness of guilt and shame,
remember that not one of us stayed with him,
not one of us shared his arrest;
but thought it best to run from the mob in the night.
We all might just as well have denied him
as did Peter.
“Is abandonment not in itself some degree of betrayal?”

It just seems so impossible that he is gone,
crucified with thieves,
mocked by priests and pagans,
buried by a stranger.

Part II

I will not say that I would have done any different,
certainly no better, no matter how many miles
walked in honor and esteem.
It takes greater faith than one might think
to face a mob of swords and staves,
much easier the saying of what one would do—
or at least should do—
rather than doing of it.

Part III

Did they remember his promise
to rebuild the temple of his own body?

Did they remember his prophecy
that he would rise again?

Did they remember Lazarus,
the raising of the others,
the healing of thousands,
and take hope?

Or did they believe that even Jonah
in the belly of the whale
did not truly grasp
the depths of despair?

I do know this:
it is not such an easy thing
to truly believe in resurrection
when the Giver of Life
is lying in a tomb.

H. Arnett
4/11/20

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No Other Way

On Passover Thursday,
I thought late into the night
about what that must have been like
for the Prophet, the Teacher, the Anointed One:

knowing from the start who it was
that would do what he did,
betrayed by a friend
who believed that in the end
he would have the money
and Jesus would be acquitted.
Didn’t work out that way.

I thought about his aloneness praying in the garden
while his closest friends slept through the hour of his agony,
his sweat as drops of blood,
crying out to his father, their father, our father,
“If there is any other way… let this cup pass from me.”

The betrayal,
the brief display of courage from Peter’s sword:
a rebuke and a man’s ear restored.
Even in that moment,
still showing compassion and mercy for his enemies,
and teaching his disciples that his way
is not the way of violence and vengeance.

The trials:
hit, spit upon, slapped, ridiculed, mocked.
Jealous zealots, hypocrites, controverting and perverting
both law and religion.
Scourged, stripped, beaten, flogged, scorned and thorned.
Manipulated mob crying out for his execution,
Roman governor pretending he was powerless,
washing his hands as if guilt were as easily removed
as dust from the streets of Jerusalem.

The long trip from crown to cross,
each step marked by loss of blood and strength,
another conscripted to bear the weight for a while.

Nails pounded in through skin and flesh,
the barbaric testing of weight against joint,
bone pulling from bone,
the crushing press against the chest,
hours of molecularly measured pain.

From noon till three,
darkness came across the face of the land,
the very hand of God himself shrouding the view
though all of heaven knew.

And at the end,
with no more blood to spend,
in that horrible moment when
the weight of every sin and transgression
ever measured between heaven and hell
was laid fully upon him
and the divine presence withdrawn,
Christ the Abandoned cried out,
“My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?”

The answer,
murmured in tortured whisper
within the very Heart of Heaven,
ruptured the rocks,
ripped the veil of the temple,
and unsettled the core of the earth
from then even unto this day:
“Because there is no other way.”

H. Arnett
4/10/20

Posted in Christian Devotions, Poetic Contemplations, Poetry, Spiritual Contemplation | Tagged , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Nocturnal Illumination

Well, folks, I sure had a bit of a scare the other night. Several days ago, when the temperature was still running a bit low, I’d worked outside most of the day. Late afternoon, I’d gotten a headache. Put my tools away and spent the evening vegetating on the couch, alternating between reports on the coronavirus and Forensic Files reruns. You know, nothing like a few hours of tranquility and serenity to prep me for a good night’s sleep.

Sometime in the middle of the night I woke up. The headache was worse and I was sweating like a field hand in August. My arms, chest and legs were soaked. “Aw, man! Here we go…”

I racked and stacked every little wrinkle of my brain trying to figure out who, what, where, when, how. “Who will I need to call?” Alternating fear and guilt, I lay there, working through such preliminary thoughts.

Then, something occurred to me, something enlightening, something soothing.

It wasn’t some supernatural peace, some divine message of hope and presence. It wasn’t a deep reassurance of faith, though in retrospect it seems that something along those lines would have been in order. No, friends and neighbors, it was a simple and direct realization that reached through the murky twists of my mental meanderings. I remembered that right before I went to sleep on that chilly evening, I’d turned on the electric blanket. And cranked it up a few notches.

Ten minutes later, no more sweat. No more worries. Well, I did still have the headache but it was gone by morning.

Sometimes the Lord rescues us with a strong and mighty hand. Sometimes he sends two boats and a helicopter. I think maybe sometimes he just waits a little while, giving us time enough to open our eyes a bit and finally perceive that we may have created our own little personal pseudo crisis.

I can easily think that he was watching me that night and when the light bulb finally came on, chuckled softly and murmured, “Well, duh!”

H. Arnett
4/9/20

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Return to Paradise, Again

On what now seems likely to be the last long trip we’ll be taking for a while, I took Randa over to Drakesboro, Kentucky back at the end of February of this year. I wanted to show her the first building where I’d ever preached for on a regular basis, a little white framed church house there in that small western Kentucky town.

Forty-five years brings some changes, even to a place like Drakesboro. It took me a few minutes to retrace the those long ago entrances, the end point of a hundred-mile drive that I’d made each Sunday for a couple of years while I was in college at Murray State University. After getting out to the edge of town, I turned around and headed back into town. On my second pass along the street, I looked off and saw a sign, “Drakesboro Church of Christ.”

There was no small white framed church house. Instead there was a small brick building with a small brick wing. Small as it was, the building seemed larger than the parking lot. Didn’t seem to be room for more than a dozen cars. Back in 1975, we’d usually have fifty folks there for church. Disappointed in the progress, I didn’t take any pictures; there wasn’t anything there that was what I remembered.

Which seemed a perfect prelude to our drive over to Paradise.

Paradise was another small western Kentucky town, made relatively famous by John Prine the same year I graduated from high school. It was a blend of nostalgia and social consciousness, a joining of childhood memories and environmental indignation. Unless you lived there or at least visited in that section of western Kentucky before the passage and enactment of the Surface Mining Control and Reclamation Act in 1977, you can’t imagine how incredibly ugly the terrain was back then. Huge open pits, as well as hideous yellow and orange sludge pools pocked the countryside where ancient forests had been stripped away. Strip mining furnished cheap coal and transformed beauty into a disgusting memorial of cooperate indifference.

Although some of the local folks didn’t care for Prine’s song—their standard of living had been greatly elevated by employment in the coal mines—I loved the song and eventually became a stalwart fan of the man’s music.

So, on a chilly, drizzly, gray day in late February, Randa and I headed over to Paradise, less than ten miles away. Well, to what was left of it. The town had been closed down decades ago and eventually, all of the houses and businesses had been torn down. I was hoping there might be something left. There wasn’t.

A big power generating station had been built there by TVA, with big cooling towers like those made famous by the iconic images of Three Mile Island. Joining those and the high discharge towers from the coal-fired steam generating section was a long slanting coal chute. Instead of finding some tenuous testimony of what had been there long ago, we were welcomed by posted signs warning that vehicles proceeding any further—and the occupants—would be subject to search. In the history of coal in this country, there has never been any lack of assertion of power and authority on the owners’ part.

There was a bit of grim irony in learning that the Paradise power plant is no longer operating. I took a selfie in front of the big sign and took several pictures of an incredibly clear small pond hidden by some trees. That little pond and the new terrain of rounded mounds sodded with fescue or covered with pine trees is a testimony to the change brought about not by corporate concern or local activism but by federal legislation. I paused again a little later to take a few more pictures of the countryside and then we headed back over to the Western Kentucky Parkway.

Even though the results of our diversion were not what I’d hoped, it was still good to revisit the area and to rekindle memories of John Prine. To remember how a student in one of the classes I taught at Ohio State University in the middle Eighties actually converted me into a John Prine fan. “You’re from Kentucky and you don’t listen to John Prine?!” she’d exclaimed. Serena and her boyfriend promptly made me a bootleg cassette tape of a couple of his albums. I was hooked. And hooked my kids. Just about any time we were riding around in that 1977 Ford Econoline van, I’d have John Prine playing. Good memories.

One of the best ones, though, was of going to a concert of his in Kansas City with three of my sons.

Sam was living with us in northeastern Kansas at the time while he was on temporary assignment at Fort Leavenworth. It was his idea for as many of the other kids who could to join us for the concert in Kansas City. Dan and Jeremiah drove five hundred miles from west Kentucky. On the surface, the boys and I had been waiting for the John Prine concert for a couple of months. But in a deeper way, we’d been waiting for thirty years.

My kids grew up hearing his songs—on the tape player during road trips in our old Ford van and in person with me playing the guitar. Sometimes we’d sing “Please Don’t Bury Me” or “That’s the Way the World Goes Round” in the living room and sometimes in their bedroom right before they went to sleep. On our trips back from Columbus, Ohio, to Murray, we’d drive across the Green River into Muhlenberg County and I’d show them the world’s largest shovel and the Paradise steam plant with its nuclear-like cooling towers. Sometimes I’d cue up John Prine’s strip mining protest song that had made all that somewhat famous for a while back in the early Seventies. My daughter, Susan, does the same thing with her kids now when they travel over from the Lexington area to Murray.

Eventually, my sons would play guitar and sing those songs to their own kids. The night before the concert, we invited my very dear friend Neil Clarkson to come over and join us for some warmup songs. We sat around the living room, playing guitars and singing John Prine, Guy Clark and a few others. Neil would later comment that he was “an honorary Arnett for an evening.” It was good to have my friend and my sons meet one another. It was especially fulfilling to have Neil and Sam become friends. That night turned out to be a great prelude to the concert.

So when we made our way over to Kansas City in March of 2017, it felt more like we’d been waiting all our lives to go to a John Prine concert.

We found our seats in the luxuriously ornate Midland Theatre in Kansas City, gawking at the architecture and furnishings. After a forty-five minute stint from the warm-up duo, John and his band came out to an enthusiastic welcome.

About an hour into the show, he sang “Souvenirs,” a haunting song about loss. The crowd quietened quickly. Jeremiah reached his arm around my shoulders and gave me a one-armed hug. As I reached over and patted Jeremiah’s thigh, Daniel gave my knee a squeeze. I hugged Dan with my right arm and then stretched a bit and squeezed Sam’s shoulder. A little later, as John played the tender and sensitive guitar prelude to “Hello in There,” a powerfully poignant song about aging parents, loss and loneliness, Jeremiah again initiated that same sequence. That theatre full of strangers seemed more like a cathedral. A sense of respect and appreciation not entirely unlike reverence spread out from the soothing familiarity of old lyrics freshly breathed into new life.

I drew in a deep breath, welcomed the warm rising in my throat that seemed to fill my chest and my mind. “You know that old trees grow stronger/and old rivers grow wilder every day.” I squeezed Jeremiah’s knee, hugged Dan’s shoulders and then rubbed Sam’s back gently but firmly.

In my heart, I gave thanks for all the lessons, all the years and for this incredible night and for all the healing and forgiving that made it possible. For this grace, for this glorious place, for all the sharings that transcend years and wounds, and draw us together. For the values that may sometimes seem blurred but in the end shine even brighter in each life to which they are passed. I gave thanks for this wonderful weekend and for the years of memories that we will carry, both from our own singing and this new expression of listening to John Prine together. One of the greatest impressions I carried from that evening was the depth of gentleness and genuine love of humanity that seemed to emanate from John Prine.

Well, that was how that felt just three years ago. Less than two months ago, on that trip when we visited Paradise, Randa and I stopped off in Murray first and visited Jeremiah and his family. Jeremiah and I sang together a while in the basement. Did a John Prine song or two.

Later, in South Carolina with Sam and his family… Yep, some more John Prine. That was right at the onset of the pandemic, right before the deniers finally acknowledged this wasn’t just a bad cough or the flu. Finally admitted it might actually be a problem. A couple of weeks before John Prine ended up in the hospital. And died.

And so, perhaps you can imagine the sadness our family now shares to know that he has passed on, another of those whose lives have been cut short in this pandemic. I knew when I first heard the news that he’d been hospitalized that John Prine’s chances were not good. Throat cancer over twenty years ago, a lung removed later, him being over seventy years old. And so when my oldest son shared with all of us a post about his death, I wasn’t shocked, or even surprised, really. Just saddened.

His death yesterday made another cut, took away another person that many will long remember. More than most and certainly in a distinctive way, John Prine has left the legacy of a life spent searching for and sharing truth and beauty, and an irascible sense of humor. He often managed to do all three at the same time. Randa and my kids and I will honor that legacy; we’ll still sing those old songs and probably learn a few of his newer ones. Teach them to our grandkids. We’ll cherish the old memories and make some new ones.

Sooner or later we’ll all find ourselves rounding a big curve and rolling right across the Green River. This damnable disease is going to make that moment sooner for thousands of folks. By sharing compassion, showing consideration for others, and following sound medical advice, most of us will make it through. Either way, I’m hoping we’ll all find our way back to Paradise.

H. Arnett
4/8/20

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Praise in the Face of Troubles

“Though he slay me, yet will I hope in him.” Job 13:15 (NIV)

In this quiet hour, I will rise, O God.
In light of all that has been devoured,
I will still give you thanks, O Lord.

In the face of coming plague,
though dread draws close enough
that I can hear its tread,
I will yet give you praise.

For whatever days remain,
though I falter and even thought might fail,
your forgiveness flows without ceasing
and your power increases in my weakness.

Though trouble rises like the flood,
and calamity rides in the wind,
your faithfulness is sure
and your love never ends.

Though the wind stirs ashes
and flickers the dying embers,
I will remember that your righteousness
is not reflected in the magnitude of my blessing,
but in depth of my obedience.

Even though I should perish
and the whole world with me,
yet you will save my soul and keep me whole
even in the midst of my affliction.

Though fever should burn in me like fire in dry grass,
though my breath be too weak to pass my lips,
though my strength be gone
and even my heart fail within me,

Though this body be overwhelmed
and all of this world pass from me,
yet I know that my soul will live forever
and I will dwell in the presence of Him Who Made Me.

H. Arnett
3/30/20

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